Bestselling author Budy Jamilly Whitfield on why people must process their story

December 21 01:42 2021
Women of color are raised to keep mental health issues under wraps, but only by working through them will they be free to find their greater purpose

What is the negative story you’ve been telling yourself all your life? Budy J amilly Whitfield wants you to name it and then process it. Because until you know where it came from, it will continue to control you—and it is not the story you should be listening to. “It is so important to process the “not good enough story,” she says. “Latina women who boss up have to release the old story and gender roles and expectations. If you grew up in a household where verbal abuse and name-calling were the norms, you could inherit those external beliefs. So this manifests itself in believing you are stupid when you fail a test. Believing you are not worthy when you are entitled to a promotion or a business opportunity. Believing you are poor and so your money mindset keeps you in debt. Believing you are unloved, so you date abusive people.”

Budy (pronounced “beauty”) experienced this herself when she evaluated her own adverse childhood experiences and feelings of being ‘unheard, unloved, and misunderstood.’ As a “wounded healer,” she brings deep personal knowledge and authenticity to helping clients. “It made me think, what can I do to help someone else?” What would her childhood look like if she’d had someone to support her? Now she feels called to be that person for others. “Despite my childhood traumas, I have persevered.” “I was placed in this world to live a purpose-driven life and to help motivate other people; I am here to support women who have also felt silenced because of their cultural expectations.” “For example, in the Latino culture, you’re not allowed to share your experiences, or you are taught to keep your family’s secrets,” she explains. 

In high school, her college counselor told her she’d never make it to a four-year college. “She was dimming my light and shooting down my dreams. As a trauma survivor, self-esteem issues are at the forefront; as a sexual abuse survivor, one doesn’t feel good about themselves. So hearing this from a person who was supposed to encourage me was hard.” But rather than believe the counselor’s message, Budy used it as motivation. As a result, she not only graduated from a four-year college with a GPA of 3.9, but she also went straight into grad school (with a newborn!) and got her master’s in social work within a year.

Now her biggest goal is to de-stigmatize mental health issues in the Black and Brown communities. “Our community views mental health as ‘putting your business out there.’ This thought process is unhealthy and unsafe,” she says. “And so I want to create a safe environment to share your struggles, your family drama, your ambitions, and dreams.” Of course, you can’t pray to the “Santos” that your issues will go away, she says. “I am a true believer in the therapeutic processes of healing.” Her podcast and coaching practice lead women through those processes. “God has given me this gift, and I have this passion for helping other women who share similar experiences.”

There’s much more from Budy in the inspiring new book Latinas Who Boss Up. “These boss ladies are truly inspiring, sharing their breakthroughs and triumphs for all of us to experience,” says author, educator, and podcaster Tam Luc. “Latinas Who Boss Up taught me more about a mix of cultures that I never stopped to examine. While there are many things shared between women of color, I also learned a few nuances that make me appreciate the Hispanic diaspora and their varied experiences. I interviewed women whose roots are in Mexico, San Salvador, the Dominican Republic, Chile, and more, from the East Coast to West Coast. While our origin stories vary, we all experience life in full color and must navigate our circumstances. These beautiful women represent the world of Latina Supermamas, and I am so happy to introduce them to you.”

Budy Jamilly Whitfield’s website is iambeauteousme.com, and she’s on Instagram @iambeauteousme. You can also learn more about her at https://bossupbestseller.com/BudyJamillyWhitfield, where you will find a link to Latinas Who Boss Up Post-Pandemic. 

About Women with Vision International

Women with Vision International aims to inspire, uplift, and empower women everywhere to never give up their dream of living their life on purpose. We gather dynamic, entrepreneurial women who are making a difference and changing people’s lives to spark conversation around the topics that impact us all, such as building their businesses, fundraising, and balancing their work and their families.  

About Tam Luc

Tam Luc is an international bestselling author and the founder of Women with Vision International who shares the triumphs, stress, and struggles of balancing her life to help women grow their businesses. After 20 years as an entrepreneur, she is able to help women leverage their messages and create the lifestyle they want through her unique book messaging strategies. Hear from some of the amazing entrepreneurs who have worked with Tam at https://womenbossupsummit.com/virtualsummit  

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